Is caring about your beauty superficial?

Is caring about your beauty superficial? and what can you do when you just feel “ugly?”


You know what I mean. Some days you just feel off your game, bad hair days, clothes don’t fit. It’s hard to pin an exact reason but you just feel plain ugly!


I have one question: How can you be a positive force for change and touch lives if you’re all caught up in feeling “ugly” and not able to walk upright and confident?

I know when I have felt this way and expressed it out loud I have been told everything from “It’s the inner that matters, it doesn’t matter how you are on the outside.” to “you are not ugly, that is silly!” or, “You are not ugly, you are beautiful!” The latter being the nicer thing. Each statement has one thing in common.


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They all gloss over your very real “ugly” & “fugly” feelings, not being at the top of your game. It is intended kindness in most cases, and among many different sects of spirituality it really is seen as being “superficial” to be concerned about such things and even looked down on for caring. It’s the inner part of you that matters, right?



Let’s look at what “superficial” means at it’s core. Let’s no longer demonize it!



Superficial= on the surface. It’s only part of the equation. When you draw on both the inner and the outer it’s powerful to use that surface to magnify the beauty that is from down deep.

Is surface not important? Reclaim “superficial” and use it as a tool to to powerfully project your inner spirit and inner love.
I am not saying to put pressure on yourself and to be your own worst critic, I am just wanting to give you a few options for when you are feeling ugly.

Before I even launch into my ideas, I want to affirm that YOU and a beautiful soul down to the core. No two people possess the exact same beauty. We are all a unique blend. It takes practice to align the inner and outer in such a powerfully congruent way.


5 ways to reclaim your beauty



1. Beauty and the bath.

Nurture (overused word= deeply care for and tend to yourself) Think about the highest potential expression of your inner love and beauty and treat that spark of divinity as such. Cleanliness next to Godliness, tend to your physical vehicle. Annoint those feet, and the rest of you as well! Nice fragrances that put you in an elevated state of mind. Elevate senses= show up for the world (yourself and others) in a divine and holy way.




Circulate chi/energy through your body. Blood moves oxygen (chi) through your entire body . Exercise motivation to be healthy so your body will not only feel better, it reflects out into the world through how you FEEL, and if we’re honest, we feel much better when we’re on point with the way we look. Do everything you can to be the very best you that exists and just strive, do your best and move your body.
It’s not all about the “six pack” and the hourglass shape, it’s your projection (how you EXPRESS yourself in the world) So, it’s about intention.
Dancing freeform is one of the best ways to move because you are expressing and moving at the same time. If you are to be able to dance, you must be able to let go of your inhibitions a bit and that’s when your inner spirit peeks out to touch other lives.




3. Wear the damn jeans!

Accept your size and shape. Yes, there are stretch jeans that are really comfy. if jeans aren’t your thing, find something else that you are really wanting to wear after you feel better about yourself. AFTER losing weight, getting over that depression, getting past distractions and busy times, etc…


4. Come out of hiding (to yourself)…


buy a bra that fits. No hiding the “girls”… and wear clothes that accentuate your shape rather than hiding behind a tent. Honestly, I know this is a toughie, and deep-rooted. I still grapple with it, but as awareness grows I begin to dress for my body and as a result I feel more beautiful and powerful.


Kelly is a Certified Nutrition & Wellness Coach, Holistic Wellness Practitioner and Certified Crystal Healer and is here to help you feel comfortable in your body and find your groove through a body positive outlook and making permanent changes in your health, weight and life! Yes, it's possible to be body positive and also release the weight, depression, anxiety and unhealthy habits to feel confident, healthy and fabulous!

She lives in Richmond Va. with her teen daughter, has the most awesome 23 year old son, cuddly pitbull and magical black cat.