The Spiritual Side of Perimenopause
There are so many cycles we go through as women. At our Menarche, or first period, we go from child to Maiden. Then we become the Mother as we go through the birth cycle, which can be human babies or other creations. Then we fold all of those experiences into wisdom as we enter the Crone phase.
Maiden and Mother have been romanticized and women look forward to these phases, but for some people, Crone has fear and dread attached to it. That phase isn't always appreciated or desired but when you realize it's the culmination of your entire world of wisdom, it's not only a gift, you contain multiple gifts for the world.
As we approach Crone-dom there are some uncomfortable things we go through.
Physically we experience some or more of these things:
Irregular periods. Sometimes coming 3 weeks apart and skipping others? Are they heavier? (like, really heavy) or lighter than usual?
Have you had night sweats or increase in body temperature? they are a spreading heat through the body with a red "flush" on your face or chest.
Insomnia or trouble getting restful sleep
Is weight starting to gather especially around your middle
Vaginal dryness, decreased sex drive and painful sex
Dry skin, thinning hair
Saggy and smaller breasts
Mood swings, fatigue, irritability, anxiety and even depression
Headaches and migraines
Brain fog and trouble concentrating
It's not just the physical things though, it's also the Grief about feeling like you are leaving important parts of your identity behind.
As we approach the Mother phase of our lives, we wax as the new moon approaches it's full peak of dynamism.
As we pass through the Mother, we approach the Crone. Waning like the light of the moon does as it approaches it's dark phase.
As we slip into shadow, we can't see as well. That time where we are not yet in the wise time of our life it is another kind of birth.
To birth our older and wiser selves we must go through a time of upheaval in all ways. Birth is messy. Each phase of womanhood is a birth and a rite of passage.
Grieving who you once were
“Death must be so beautiful,
to lie in the soft brown
Earth, with the soft grasses
waving above one’s head,
and listen to silence,
to have no yesterday,
and no tomorrow
to forget time,
to forgive life,
to be at peace.
”
Grief celebrates what was, grieving something is honoring it. Honoring the aspects of you you feel like you are leaving behind.
While you are moving on, those aspects of yourself are not gone.
The physical symptoms are the birth pains we go through and there is light on the other side. The crone can see in the dark. She has so much depth and knowledge if she allows it to be.
“How can I honor this new cycle of my life?”
There are both physical ways, mental/emotional ways and spiritual ways.
Get plenty of sleep and honor your new rhythm. You may like to stay up later and enjoy the night, you may go the “early to bed, early to rise” direction. It’s important to get the sleep you need. If you can, try allowing your body to choose. Forego the alarm clock if you can, go to bed when you’re tired… dream a lot… get up when you get up naturally.
Keep your mind active. Never stop learning. Read, have deep conversations, take classes, play number or word games. Exercise that brain.
Stay active. Keep your body moving. Find your “soul mate workout” as Chalene Johnson calls it. That workout you love to do and brings you to life. For some it is high energy cardio (or High Intensity Interval Training or HIIT), some people prefer strength exercises (with weights or body weight- no equipment required, other people like to dance, yoga, pilates (one of my faves is a nice combination called PiYo).
Never stop growing spiritually. It’s a great opportunity to deepen your relationship with however you experience God/Creator/Source. As a crone the door of wisdom is cracked open for you. You can enter into this depth of spirit. Pray, meditate, journal it all out and remember you keep growing up until the day you pass.
Treat your body like a temple, it is a sacred vessel and needs to be treated as such. Give your body the nutrients it craves, that will help you through a lot of the physical symptoms that sometimes go along with this period of life.
Accept grief as part of the process. It’s nothing to fear. HERE IS A GOOD LISTEN if you’re experiencing grief.
I went through a surgical menopause. I was already in perimenopause with some of the signs that go along with it. Many things hit me all at once and it was and still is a challenge. I am following the suggestions I wrote above, I found my new rhythm. I now help others find their way, if you want to REACH OUT TO ME, please know you’re welcome to. I am not perfect. I’m finding my way through this grief.
“When death comes
Like an iceberg between the shoulder blades,
I want to step through the door full of curiosity, wondering:
What is it going to be like, that cottage of darkness?
………………..
When it’s over, I want to say: all my life
I was a bride married to amazement.
I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.
”
Kelly St Claire is a Certified Crystal Healer and ACM-Advanced Crystal Master through the Hibiscus Moon Crystal Academy, trained Life and Holistic Nutrition Coach through the Southwest Institute of Healing Arts, and Master Hair Designer/Beauty Stylist for over 25 years.
She helps people change negative self- perceptions around their bodies, emotional eating and reinvent their beauty.
She found her way through a deep journey of depression, distorted body image, destructive relationship with food and lack of self-confidence through integrating the physical side of health with the energetic body.
She works with Fitness, Nutrition, Crystals, Supplements, and Self Discovery and is 100% committed to helping you!!!
SHE IS AVAILABLE TO HELP YOU CONNECT WITH YOUR HEALTH GOALS, DON’T HESITATE TO CONTACT HER.
She lives in Richmond, VA where she offers personal beauty care services. She offers health, fitness and wellness coaching.
She has a 25-year-old son and a 20-year-old daughter and loves on her two black cats and her fuzzy, white puppy <3